As mentioned in my previous script blog post, it was clear that the script needed a fair bit of work. Nonetheless, below is the second draft of the script:
As well as changing the script so that it matches Simon's feedback, I spoke to Kate and we've added in extra parts of dialogue and content which will enable our audience to sympathise and learn more about our characters. We added in:
- Vic sympathising with Maddie when she talks about her not getting the role of Wendy during her
interview
- Making Giles seem worried when John wants Chantelle as the lead role, as he doesn't want to
loose his money that he invests into the company
- Making Alex seem more passionate about the company, by altering her interview during the party
scenes
- Showing why Alex joined, and a bit about her past with her ex (when talking to Maddie at the
party scenes)
- Making everyone apart from Alex call Maddie a different name for comedic reasons and to make
Maddie stand up for herself during the party scene and correct Chantelle.
Feedback
Simon again gave me feedback on the script. He generally said the script was much better but still needed some work to be done, such as:
This feedback was very beneficial for me and I'll now work on the third draft of the script. This will include adding in different narrative aspects which tell more about the background of the characters to try to make them seem more sympathetic.
0 comments:
Post a Comment